The Guest Blog Series - Natalie
If you would like to submit to the Guest Blog Series, please go to my Calling All Bloggers! post. For further information about depression, suicidal thoughts, or anxiety, please see the relevant links below.
Natalie: 'It Does Get Better if You Just Take that First Step'
My name's Natalie. I'm 22 and I live in the UK. I want to share my story to show people that however depressed, anxious, lonely or suicidal you may feel it DOES get better if you just take that first step. How do I know this? Because I was that person!
My mental health problems started about four years ago when I was eighteen. My best friend had just moved to Australia and it was never the same being with other friends because they just wasn't her. I had no job and I couldn't seem to get one, which knocked my confidence, but I was studying at college which was good.
That was until my anxiety problems started!
In the last couple of months before I eventually got some help things got worse and I became suicidal. I couldn't do anything anymore, my illness had took everything from me and I just didn't see the point. I remember every time I crossed a road I would think about a car running me over or I would stand at my bedroom window and imagine me jumping out of it and lying on the ground.
Thankfully I was too scared to go though with it. However, the self harming continued, I had lost one of my closest friends that I had known most of my life, I was in tears everyday and I just became so isolated and no one really understood. My anxiety had taken over my life! The once bouncy, happy sociable girl I was in my school days was gone and I was literally nothing. I thought my life was over....
I am starting to get back some control over the anxiety and I now live by "I will not let my anxiety stop me from doing ANYTHING anymore". I think of this when I'm feeling very anxious about doing something and it seems to work. I haven't self harmed or had any suicidal thoughts since that first doctors appointment and for the first time in nearly four years I see a future! My mental illness has weirdly been a blessing in disguise for me. Before all of this I never knew what I wanted to do. I was going from course to course hating each one! Now I want to go back to college and do a counselling course because I want to help anyone that might be in the same situation as me.
And to anyone that's reading this I want you to know you're not alone! All those days I sat in my room wondering where my friends were I felt so so so so alone because there was no one I felt I could talk to without feeling like a burden or being scared that they wouldn't understand. I want this to change! I have set up my own twitter page called 'Don't Forget to Smile' which I made for that very reason! So if you need someone to talk to for whatever reason then just follow me.
Thank you for reading, love you all! <3
About the Author
Information about Anxiety - Includes information on the various types of anxiety.
Information about Depression - Includes information on the causes of depression and what can help.
Information on Feeling Suicidal - Includes a video of one man's experiences and some useful resources.
Information on CBT - Include information about CBT and the different ways of using CBT.
If you have any questions, or would like to add to this discussion, feel free to use the comments section below.